Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Pain-in-the-ass-habits !



Habits describe human nature. Don't they? But nowadays, mine are such a pain in the ass. I don't know what is wrong, but past two weeks, few things have turned into a weird routine. Mind you, what you are about to read are just two weeks older! But bitches are getting consistent each passing day.


1. It's getting colder here day after day. I usually take bath with cold water. Nowadays, after entering the bathroom, all I do is stare at that icy water, wondering what to do with it. How am I supposed to take bath with that icy bitch? So I just stare for 5 mins and all of a sudden I take that bucket full of water on my body. Sigh! No wonder I feel sick. 
P.S. I do have a geyser in my bathroom. Am I dumb?


2. Every night I swear to God that I will keep my door key in place. I never do. It specially irritates me to the core. Because I am obsessed with this organization thingy. In my room, you won't find a thing moved an inch away from its place. But when it comes to the door key, I get screwed. Now missing the office bus or running after it is a part of my life. I get up exactly half an hour before arrival of the bus and I spend at least 10 mins searching for this damn key ! I mean how hard is to get a key-chain or place the key on the table?


3. I spill milk almost everyday. To break this routine, I used to stand in front of gas like an idiot, hoping to cut off the ignition at the boiling point. 5-10 mins and nothing happens. Then I suddenly feel this urge to listen to music. So I go to bedroom, switch on my laptop and by the time I return, bang ! it's all gone. Bastard is playing with me huh?


4. I sleep chanting , "I am the master of my own bladder" The simple reason is, if I wake up to pee in the middle of night, I can't sleep afterwards. So I make sure that I drink plenty of water, pee and then sleep. And fuck! After few hours, I again wake up to pee! The more I try to not think about it, the more intense it becomes. Winter effects or bloody moody penis of mine?


5. I stare at people for no reason. Actually I have this tendency to stare at someone when I am lost in my thoughts. But nowadays, every-time I stare at someone, it happens to be a beautiful girl. No wonder I get "Mind-your-own-business-you-creep, never-saw-a-girl-before? You-horny-bastard" look. :(


6. I switch on alarm clock in my phone. I sleep for 15 mins and then convince myself that it's not on. Furious, I wake up again. Stare at it. See it is on. In frustration, turn it off and then on again. Then sleep. I still don't realize it's on for 7.30 PM and not AM. I have been doing this since 4 days now. Even apes are smarter than me !




Is the world really coming to end? Somebody save me :(

20 comments:

  1. Pinky swears? You use them? Really? How old are you? *poke s tongue out* And 4 happens with me too, only I don't do what you do. Actually, what happens with you doesn't happen with me too. OKay I am blabbering.
    and 5 was hilarious. Funny guy, you.
    and stop using pink text. Your parents are going to have their doubts confirmed if they read your blog bwahahaha. :P (the doubts as mentioned in the last post)

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  2. First of all, COPY CAT!!! I wrote something on similar lines, albeit with people instead of habits. Habits are what you make out of it, and I don't regret any of mine. Not even smoking.

    1. Yes, you are dumb. The topmost level perhaps.
    2. "God would have bored of dying"?? Please explain. This is called lack of organisational skills and not a habit.
    3. Spill milk can also spilling it on yourself. As far as I know, apart from the white colored product that comes out of a cow, the word milk doesn't ring any other bell for me.
    4. Bloody moody penis? I hope its only in the pee case. I don't want your wife calling me up in the middle of the night asking me as to what on earth is wrong with my friend :P
    5. You enjoy this one, don't you?
    6. Funny habit I guess. I have the one of promptly switching it off and going back to sleep.

    The world might come to an end. Before it ends, save yourself.

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  3. @1... hahahahahahaha u sure are :p

    @2... :O seriously???? Isn't it such a girli thing to lose ur stuff :p

    @3... Hahahahahahaha rofl :p

    @4... Mayb u shud try to change ur drink-plenty-of-water-and-then-sleep habbit :p

    @5... hahahahahahahahahahaha dehan sae kisi din pata lagae stare k sath eik addad chamat b a rae ho :p

    @6... I did it once wo subah k 6 ki bejae sham k 6baje baj para tha during my chemistry's class and I was kicked out of the class after a fitttttttttt bestii :p tab sae i've been carefull

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  4. Gheheeheh! About the whole key thing, Ditto man ditto!
    And about the bladder thing, ditto again! :(
    Staring at a beautiful chck also ditto! Atleast u willbe mistaken to be a horny bastard. I get mistaken to be a lesbian :(

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  5. @Crystal - In case of God, yes :) and I use pink sometimes only for better clarity. Don't worry, my parents still won't care ! ;)

    @Soumya - Copy cat? :@ grr..I don't even remember about your post :S
    //1. Thank you. You know me well :D
    //2. Lack of organizational skill or habit. Whatever it is, it sucks!
    //3. Glad it doesn't ring any other bell for you :P
    //4. Yes, it's only in the pee case ;)
    //5. Bingo. Again, you know me well !
    //6. Chalo, at least you found something funny :D :P ;)

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  6. @Aliza -
    @1 - :(
    @2- No, it isn't . Dumbness doesn't take gender discrimination into consideration :P
    @4 - That makes it even worse. Trust me, you wouldn't wanna know why !
    @5 - Not yet. So far so good. But one day, I am sure to get slapped :D
    @6 - So you learn from your mistakes. Smart you are ! Teach me something please :(


    @Red - So many similarities we have. :D Glad there is at least someone like me on the earth !

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  7. Alright! I do not read Blogger Profiles but I went and read yours to confirm the location, if any. Ah well, so Bangalore or Pune, either place is not that cold. So, you should be able to manage without the geyser. However, if you can not, THEN GET THE GODDAMN GEYSER.

    Pee, bit. Same pinch. No penis in my case though. It's the fucking vagina that has to pee.

    I am not working these days, so, alarm clock is no more my business....

    Rest I guess you should be able to handle as you mention in your profile you can help in other sorrows, stand in front of the mirror and read this post...

    Cheers!

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  8. @TheBluntBlogger - Wow. I hope this is not one of those "You-visit-I-visit-back" thing ! If it is not, then thanks for stopping by :) Hmm.. P.S. Says I do have a geyser :D Handle rest of the things? I desperately want to! One fine day, for sure. Cheers ;)

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  9. Hey Stranger...me back :D...I can never ever take bath in cold water. I really don't know how you do that. The key habbit for me is with the ID card, it will be there some where in my goddam bag, but It will take me ages to take it out and swipe and get into the car park by which time people have given me all kinds of looks. Why have you been MIA on my blog for so long...sab kushal mangal apart from you realizing apes are smarter than you that is :P

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  10. yoooo..you are back ! Party :D MIA? :S Aww..I suck in recognizing abbreviations :S.. Kindly enlighten !

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  11. Kya yaar...itna bhi nahi aata...MIA maane missing in actiob...simbal...but you know I suck as well at abbreves....I hate them infact...oh yes I am back...and rearing to go :D...

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  12. Am I late here..oh YES I am..okay this post is so funny and i guess I arrived too late and I dont now what else to comment..Gosh

    okay at least on the world gonna end part..nah its not goin end any sooner

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  13. @DRAGON - oh..too much work at office :'( .. Hardly get time nowadays..but yeah, I will be back soon :D

    @TOSM - Hey you ! :D How are you doing? Sorry for late reply, was out of station :) And doesn't matter if u are late, you still left a comment ;) :happy:

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  14. Quite amazing post
    n its not like ur dumb n that pink swears its something which u dunt want to do ..... so u dunt :)

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  15. Hey ! First of all, welcome and thanks for stopping by :D. Haha.True. It's something I don't want to but I need to . Anyway, who cares? ;)

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  16. Having a bath with cold water even when there is a geyser.. Hahaha..this is sheer dumbness boy! :P

    And no. 5 happens with a friend of mine too. Is this disease so common or is it just an excuse? Ahem!! ;)

    And please stop having pinky swears. It sounds so gay-ish. :D

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  17. phew ! Look who is here :D :happy: And you actually are following my blog. Well, It means A LOT !! Thanks for stopping by :)

    And it's neither a disease not an excuse :P It just happens !
    :/ gay-ish? whoa ! I hereby announce that I am never gonna have pinky swears ! (at least not until I get married to a GIRL!) ;)

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  18. Yes! when dumbness of two collide, shit happens as in the following-each-other's-blog thing.

    And on a serious note, you are really funny!
    *compliment hai compliment* =D

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